A Straw Bale Garden Was Born Today…
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee
This evening I began putting plants in my straw bales. This is ‘the’ garden to have if you aren’t into working with a shovel, rake, hoe… or you can’t do heavy work. All you do is open the straw up, put some potting soil in the hole…. or place the biodegradable cup of soil with the plant… into the hole.
It’s a ‘pretty way’ to garden… it looks so ‘something special’. I am hoping it rains tonight to ‘make my garden grow’. :))) I watered my plants, and the straw bales with Miracle Gro …
I bought a colorful pair of gardening gloves to wear while placing plants into the straw… I began ‘planting‘ without them… my fingernails had dirt under them! It’s been since ‘before’ Tommy died, that I planted flowers. I couldn’t until… today.
Today, I went to Walmart to purchase plants, both vegetable and flowers. On the way there, I was in an area of Wake Forest where for a short time one could pretend they are in the mountains… up on a big hill sitting at the stoplight. I was feeling excited, happy that I was going to actually begin a ‘garden’.
Out of the blue… my happiness was crushed by a heavy weight. It felt like someone threw an invisible thick blanket over me, separating me from … happiness. Happiness, looking forward to planting flowers.
I felt the terrible grief of Tommy being gone… never going to come back. I began crying inside, trying to hold the tears back… so, when I went into Walmart… I wouldn’t look like I’d been crying. I began making crying sounds, I couldn’t breathe… all the while trying to hold the tears back.
Tommy’s gone… Tommy’s gone… went through my mind. While I sat at that stoplight ‘looking out from the mountain’ I was on… I saw beautiful trees, buildings, and bright sunshine all around me. I was seeing such beauty as… I was experiencing something so… awful.
All I wanted to do was to lay down, rub my forehead with my hands. Close my eyes, go to sleep … not feel anything. Will the grief stay, will it leave me in a little while? I wondered, because ‘before’ I had felt such happiness.
I made it to Walmart, parked near the stacks of potting soil. I got out of the pickup, began walking through all the gardening supplies.
I looked at stacks of bags full of sand… some was pink, some was green. Amazing, I’d never seen bags so big… full of colored sands for children to play in… in their sandpiles. Wouldn’t I had been the happiest little girl to play in … colored sand!
I walked by stepping stones, border stones, all kinds of stone … then, I began getting to the plants.
I chose Sweet Mint (I love mint plants… I used to have so much of it growing when I used to live in the mountains). I chose several varieties of tomatoes, French Marigolds, Orange Bell Pepper, Cucumber plants. I can’t remember all I chose…
I looked at the packages of seeds, bought vegetable and flower seeds. I found Cosmos… one of my favorite flowers. I got Sunflowers, and more Marigolds in seed form. These are happy flowers. I found a pack of Daisy seeds… they reminded me of my mother… her first name was ‘Daisy’.
I went to the Miracle Gro section, chose a Miracle Gro Liquidfeed system to go on the end of the pretty orange garden hose that I picked. It’s a happy-shiny soft orange! :)))
On the way home, I stopped at Arby’s to order a roast beef sandwich… I sat there with grief in my heart. I ate that sandwich, never tasting the flavor… grief affected me so deeply. I didn’t feel good, all I wanted to do was to get home. Just please be at home…
Finally… I was home. I came inside after placing the plants beside the straw. I debated on laying down with my grief… or to go outside to… garden. Skip called me, and I told him what had happened to me. He wondered what triggered it…. I didn’t know.
I told him I was fine now, and when I turned my cellphone off, I headed outside. I began playing with the plants, and before I knew it… my straw bale garden became ‘real’… it’s officially a ‘Straw Bale Garden’… now. :)))
Not only that… I got past the ‘grieving spell’ this time. I’m so thankful… I didn’t know how long it would take. I’m afraid, dread being overwhelmed with grief like that…. so much time can go by before I’m alright again. Thankfully… I was smiling again when I stood back to admire my … Straw Bale Garden! Everything is… alright! :)))
You are awe-inspiring!
:)))
Hope you feel better soon my friend! 🙂
Sounds like the garden is coming along well!!! 🙂
Love and hugs!
Prenin.
I began feeling good again once ‘planting my garden’… :))) Prenin, I actually felt happy again… this morning, I am smiling at the sunshine… it’s smiling back at me! :))) (well, it’s shining on me, ha!). It rained some last night… my plants are beautiful this morning. I’m going to keep putting photos so, you and everyone can see how all grows! :)))
Oh I am so glad you atre better right now. the grieving process is ongoing and it happens at all times these ‘grief attacks’ don’t be ashamed or worried, it is what we will deal with the rest of our lives. A quick story I went to a Big Lots discount store, walking the aisles just wandering when I went down the outdoor decor aaisle I gasped and begin sobbing so loud, doubled over and in such great pain that customers and the manager came running over. I was embarassed but more than anything I was grief stricken, for in that aisle were lighthouses, seashell deorations, nets etc for decorating a patio or something. My daughter was a marine biologist she loved that ‘look’ and collected lighthouses abundantly. seeing all that displayed well it did me in. So go with those times Gloria and who cares if you go to Walmart looking as if you had been crying …you had been and with good reason. Love and prayers my friend.~Len
Len, I sure understood what happened as I was reading how grief happened at Big Lots… I go through this, also. Sometimes, it is just so overwhelming…… I’ll tell you a funny story … Skip loves to play tricks on me!
I keep red eyes (like I’ve been crying… because of allergies). Sometimes, worse than other times…… one time Skip played a trick on me in the supermarket… two young boys were grinning at me, and remarked on my red eyes… that Skip told them I’d been ‘smoking pot’!!! I couldn’t believe he said that…
Those two boys really began smiling at me, then. They liked that… even when I tried to tell them that Skip was always playing jokes on me, and I didn’t smoke pot…. they believed Skip!
LOL that sounds like something my hubs would do…onery men gotta love them don’t we? LOL Have a beautiful, blessed, blogging day!
:))) Oh yes! Skip plays funny tricks on me… used to be that he and Tommy would all the time. :))) Happy day, Len!
What an idea! Looks easy and productive, I like the no shovel bit. God bless. I will be watching for the results of your work.
Okay… it’s so enjoyable, and …easy. So pretty.. I’ll be putting photos so, you can see. :)))
Gloria, in appreciation for your support, advice and friendship I have nominated you for the Best Moments Award. I hope you will accept this award. http://tersiaburger.wordpress.com/wp-admin/post.php?post=2595&action=edit&message=6&postpost=v2
Tersia, how honored I am for you to even think of me! I’m not good with doing the awards as it takes a lot of time I don’t have. I want to tell you though… you have touched my very heart with your words. You made tears in my eyes, because I felt your words. Thank you, my special friend, Tersia. Love, Gloria
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It comes like that, doesn’t it? Then it goes and you hope it never does again. But it will, and again you will make it through. We always do. I’m sorry for your loss.
Thank you