All Required… Is A Heart

All Required… Is A Heart

By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee

Artwork by Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee….. 2014    ‘Just A Doodle by Gloria’………….

Look at my face… what do you see

Do you see kindness looking out at you

Or, do you see the sadness in my eyes

Do you look past the kindness, sadness

To see the tears in my mind, see my grief

That’s tucked deep back inside my … soul

I don’t think you do… I don’t let you see my eyes

Long enough… to look deep inside of me

Too emotional… intimate to let strangers look

Look at my private thoughts, grief … embarrassing

Embarrassing to let you see that I hurt

Hurt for the loss of my only child… my son

Grief is a strange emotion… happy one moment

Crying the next … angry… helpless

Helpless… because what am I going to do

All things are possible… no, they aren’t

I can’t bring my son back… he’s dead, gone forever

Move that mountain with faith

All the faith in the world can’t make Tommy come back

He’s not going to rise from the ashes

His ashes… sadly, Tommy’s not coming back

No matter how positive I am… how much faith I have

I can’t raise the dead… I have to learn acceptance

Learn acceptance… learn to live my life without my only child

Live life to the fullest… or choose to lay down, live like I’m dead

Until the day comes for me to die… which do I choose

I choose to live life to the fullest… to feel pain, cry if needed

Be sad, happy, excited… feel everything life has to offer

I loved my son… he knew it… thankfully I saw him

Saw him the evening before he died… I have his smile to remember

I have his voice to remember, saying… ‘Mama, these are the best sandwiches I’ve ever eaten’

See his beautiful eyes smiling that sunshine smile, hear his laughter

As he took big, happy bites of the sandwiches I made for him

I know they weren’t the best sandwiches he’d ever eaten

But, they were at the moment he savored them

How did he know to leave me a happy memory to make me smile

Make me smile, comfort me… in all these days after his death

How many times have I said, “Thank-God”?

I’m so fortunate to have such happy thoughts in my mind

Some people don’t, you know… they are tormented by theirs

Mine comfort me…. I am so thankful

Thank-you, Tommy… thank-you my precious son

I should have died before you, my child

Preparing you, I was… to not be sad if I died before you

Who would have thought to prepare… me … for the loss of my child

We live… we die… knowing our children will carry on

We leave them good memories, and impart the knowledge we have

For them to live the best lives they possibly can

How many of you… ever prepared yourself for your child to die

It’s not the way it’s supposed to be

We don’t die before our children do… how can ‘we’ be carried on

The death of a child causes a link in the chain to be broken

One that can never be repaired… always be weakened

To their children, if the mothers are selfish, uncaring

Uncaring until… the day comes, their children show them the same

The same love, compassion shown to the grandparents of their parent who died

Do you believe in an eye for an eye… tooth for a tooth?

If you dish it out… should you be able to take it back

Take it back… feel what it feels like… feel the pain

You know… ‘don’t dish it out… if you can’t take it’…

I don’t really wish that… I have too much love in my heart

To waste time wishing bad things on someone, to hate, be uncaring

I’ve learned to live life by almost dying myself several times

I’ve learned a lot about living… what’s important in life

It’s not about material things… and God knows I’ve ‘had it all at one time or other in the past’

It’s not keeping up with the Jones… being rich (though, being rich can be wonderful doing special things for people; making dreams come true)

No… that’s not what life is about… not material things, money

You won’t believe the simple things life is really about, cost nothing

Love, caring, compassion… all required… is a Heart

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6 thoughts on “All Required… Is A Heart

  1. Pingback: Let’s Do This Thing… | GRANNY'S COLORFUL

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