Things are Already Good when Bad Things Happen …
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@grannygee
Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@grannygee
May is the saddest month of the year for me. I have some serious emotional periods of time … still yet. I thought this May would be different. Maybe … it’s going to always be like that.
That’s part of being a grieving mother … May is the month my child died.
May is the month I shared my last Mother’s Day with my son … two weeks before his death.
May is the month my brother died from an overdose.
May is the month … a stranger’s life collided with my child’s life and changed his life forever … for one year exactly until his death. A horrible accident. My Son lived in Hell for exactly one year leading up to his death … survivor’s guilt.
Yet … this is what shines out from May. Just because something is all bad … doesn’t mean there aren’t good things hidden just behind them. That’s right … for example:
I found out yesterday from my oncologist something I didn’t realize … when he came in, sat down on a stool … rolled up to me, looked me in the eyes, said in a quiet voice, “you shouldn’t be here today”.
Instantly my mind began seeing a vision of my calendar. Yes! Yes, I had an appointment with the oncologist today! I told him in a soft voice that my appointment was for this day.
All was so quiet … he smiled at me, repeated what he said … “you shouldn’t be here today”. By this time, I am becoming confused, until … it began to dawn on me like the sun coming up in the early morning. Ah-hhhhhhhhhhhhh, oh my God! I’m beginning to hear something different than what I thought.
“Sixteen years … you shouldn’t be here today with what you had”. 98% of people who had what you had … aren’t living today.
That meant … I’m in the 2% … who survived the battle of non-Hodgkins lymphoma. All battles aren’t the same. I walked on the edge of death for three years. It almost got me … more than one time.
I fought Death like Hell, writhing in pain the average person will never know. I still go through pain … ‘forever’ pain to live.
Every day of my life I am reminded. That’s from the two major surgeries I had, called Thoracotomy … I had TWO … one is bad enough.
Today, I live in pain … my trade-off to live. I don’t take pain medicine for it. I find it hard to take pain medicines … if I do, I’ve become most desperate.
Getting back to my oncologist … I sat there stunned, shocked … cold chills went over my body as the realization of what he said, sunk in. I didn’t know that!
I knew I was a miracle … but, I didn’t … know how much. I’ve lived 16 years of life when … 16 years ago, I should have … died. Can you stop, imagine someone telling you that?
Isn’t it beautiful, amazing, wonderful, special? I’m smiling as I write that. Isn’t that a reason for the month of May to have something happy, good in it … in my life?
Oh, I can’t forget … Skip’s birthday is on May 13th. Isn’t that special?
Oh … Skip is a miracle, also. He survived colon cancer. I battled non-Hodgkins from 1998 until in the 2000’s (3 years I battled to live)… Skip was diagnosed with colon cancer in 2000.
I was still sick when I took care of him. He took care of me while he was sick. We were alone … no one was here to help us. Tommy was in Germany.
We both are lucky to be here today because … those weren’t the only times Death came looking for us, almost took us away.
So yet … this is another good thing about May … Skip lives to see another birthday. I’m here to see it.
I have so much to be grateful for … no matter how bad things get in my life. Because … they are already good when any bad happens. I just have to stop, remember. Anything good that happens is a special thing … a bonus in my life.
This really is true … I’ve lived it many years … I ‘know’ it … no matter how bad things get … good things happen. Some things like this … have already happened.
Because … like in my life … things are already good when any bad happens.
Photos/true story are both owned, written by me. Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@grannygee