I Was Seeing Tommy … Time Stood Still
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter
My son, Tommy … and his son, Taban
(Photo owned by Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee)
The man walked by the freezers sitting in the frozen meat department of Walmart. He was a little over six feet tall. He had strawberry-blonde hair … it was cropped close to his head. He wore gold-rim glasses.
He was a handsome man. I couldn’t help but, stop … watch him as he moved around with his family. I heard his voice … it made me smile … tears came into my eyes. He had a soft voice.
A little boy ran around him, his mother, and sister. He was saying something to his daddy. The man reached down, touseled the little boy’s hair … that was just like his daddy’s. I felt a pain in my Heart … like someone reaching inside my chest … squeezing it.
The man looked over, saw me … nodded his head, smiled. Just like Tommy would do to a stranger. Polite, nice.
Emotion welled up inside my chest … I felt the urge to cry. Tears rolled in a warm flow down my cheeks. Anyone watching me as I was watching the man would wonder why this middle-aged woman stood … watching a younger man.
No one would know that for a few moments … I was seeing Tommy. I was seeing Tommy, my son … my only child … in the person of this man. I was hearing Tommy … hearing my grandson, Taban … as they joked, played.
The world stood still … I could only watch. I forgot where I was. I wanted to go over … to look closer to see how much the man looked like Tommy in the face. I was fascinated at how much he resembled Tommy. At that moment … I was seeing Tommy.
Note by this author:
I know it is always going to be someone to remind me of Tommy. Tommy is my son who died May 29, 2010. He collapsed on the beach (Myrtle Beach) … died … he was doing what he was looking forward to doing. That was playing with Taban, his 3 year old son.
Tommy and his family arrived at Myrtle Beach that evening to spend a week. He made it in time … to go on his final journey. No one knew Tommy had 3 blockages to his heart. He didn’t know it.
I cry for Tommy. My tears are silent … there’s no crying aloud. I grieve in silence. My grief has been silent since that evening. I never bother anyone with something they can’t possibly help me with.
For five years … I have worked through this grief. For the first three years I couldn’t face it … I stayed somehow in darkness. I couldn’t cope living life without my precious son in it.
Thank God for my keyboard … it has seen such grief, pain … all silent. Thank God for all of you who have been with me on this journey in my life. I almost didn’t make it to … today. I smile now … everything is alright. No matter how bad … everything gets alright … maybe not like before, but … to the point where one can go on.
Photos/true story are owned, written by me … Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee #Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee