I Never Saw it Coming … I’m on a New Journey in Life
By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter
Gloria Faye Brown Bates/Granny Gee
I’ve been missing in action for a short time. I’ll tell you why … it seems I’m on an unexpected journey … another twist in my life … I never saw it coming. Not only that … I can’t believe it happened.
What can I do about it? Is there anything to learn from it all? Will I just lay down … whine, cry ‘woe is me’? Won’t you feel sorry for me?
Do redwood trees bow to the ground when a storm whips through?
Hell no … they hold their ground … their mighty strength holds their trunks up … they weather the storm no matter how rough it is. When you think of … Gloria/Granny Gee … think of redwood tree.
Don’t ever feel sorry for me. I never feel sorry for me. When life throws these twists/turns in my life … after the initial shock … like someone who has been thrown hard to the ground from a horse … as soon as I can get my breath … my ass comes up off that ground (never mind I’m crawling, grasping at something to hold on to) … I am coming back up! I mean it … I am ready to fight my ass off to be alright again.
How many battles have I fought in my life? Many, many battles of all kinds. This isn’t my first one … but, I smile here … I always hope its my last battle to fight.
I would like to sail through the rest of my life without any battles, sickness … see how it feels to just live a normal life like a lot of people do. If I can’t … so be it … you are going to see me fight like a warrior to live. All Hell’s going to break out … until I win … until I’m the champion. I’m going to win!
The storm might take branches off here, there … scarring the redwood tree’s body. It’s still going to stand strong, mighty … and as the sun dries the raindrops off its limbs … you will see the strength in its form … you might even see a smile reflecting in the raindrops as they dry away. Think of me … life has made me this way.
I may be very strong … don’t be surprised if you see a few tears flow down my face. Just because someone is strong doesn’t mean … it hurts less. Sometimes … that extra pain life throws at me … hurts … really hurts. Yes, like you … I cry my share of tears. Does it mean I’m weak?
Oh, Hell no! I might be weak for a short time until that second breath comes in … then, you will see me go into action. I’m going to get to a point I can deal/cope with what’s ahead of me.
Now … why have I been ‘missing in action’? On October 3rd, 2015 … Skip and I decided to have Chinese food at a favorite restaurant. It’s a buffet-type restaurant … the people are so friendly. It is a place we always loved to go to.
The manager was showing us to the table … when all of a sudden … my feet went out from under me … I vaguely remember coming down on my left knee … oh my God! the excruciating pain! I heard my bone break … so did Skip, and the manager.
The next thing I know I was sitting flat on the floor in pure agony, shock. The pain! It’s the first time I never saw a fall coming so, I could try to prevent it. It’s the first time in my life … I never even thought to jump up, look around to see who was looking.
I sat there, stunned. I could hear the concern from both Skip, and the manager. I began crying … I began crying in front of people … I began crying in … public. Oh my! This is something I never do … I didn’t even feel embarrassed … I just … cried.
The manager took me in his vehicle to the hospital Emergency Room. Skip followed. Our pickup truck was too high to get in … the pain in my left leg, knee was too great … I couldn’t bend it to get in. When I finally got in … I was to the point of … screaming out in pain. Somehow, I managed not to … I sat there … and cried silently.
My left knee was x-rayed … the knee cap was broken. They put a stabilizer on it … and gave me crutches, a prescription for pain medicine. This is where it stands.
The manager kept saying he’d told the owner to fix the floors before someone fell … he called the manager while I was sitting in the chair they helped me in. The manager came quickly … he had rolls of carpet in his arms ( I remember seeing that through my pain) … he began putting them down quickly.
The manager also, said they had good insurance … not to worry … everything would be alright. Well … it isn’t alright.
As it stands … I need medical attention … and no orthopedic doctor will touch me unless I have hundreds of dollars to pay up front … they have to consider it ‘self-pay’ … they have no one to bill the medical treatment to.
Like many people … I don’t have that kind of extra money. I have been turned down quite a few times now, I have called a list of doctors … each one says the same thing. No one will see me. I have worked in the business office at a hospital … things have changed a lot ‘now’.
Am I upset? Well, I know I haven’t had medical attention for something serious since the accident on October 3rd … today is October 7th. I am afraid it could affect my walking ability later … I can feel the toll it’s taking on my body. Not only that … I know I’m hurt in other places … but, until I have more x-rays I can’t say just yet.
I have been afraid … I won’t lie. This is real life … life we all live if we aren’t wealthy. This is what people like me have to go through … the embarrassment on top of being turned down … doctor after doctor if you don’t have hundreds of dollars in cash to pay as soon as you walk in the door. They want it before someone is treated to make sure they get it. So, for now … I wait.
I know, I know … get someone to get the insurance information, policy number. All I will say is … it is in the process. I pray there really is insurance to help me, and the manager told us the truth.
Sometimes, unfortunately … when people aren’t from this country … they can go back where they come from … I pray they are like me, they will do what’s right. I really liked all of them … yes, I know … it has nothing to do with liking people ‘now’ … I need medical attention.
So … this is where I ‘stand’ … at this very moment … in the process of praying for the insurance information so, I can get medical attention for my broken knee cap.
The strange thing is … you know how I’ve written about my Grandma Alma many times through the past years … I am thinking of her as I’m experiencing this. She was paralyzed for over 20 years … I remember seeing her do her best to walk … as a little girl I would be very sad for her. I didn’t understand … but, did understand enough to see tears in her eyes and know somehow, she was in pain. I knew I didn’t want her to fall … I would stay close by.
‘Now’ … I think of my Grandma Alma as I try to walk … and I’m injured … not paralyzed. I will get better … but, my Heart cries for her each step I take. My poor, precious Grandma Alma.
Well, this certainly is how things happen out of the blue … this is how life can take a twist/turn unexpectedly. This is how one can be thrown on another road in life … and never see it coming.
All that is left to do now … is to do the very best I can. I was on one road in life … losing weight, self-improvement … now, my road has become entwined with another road … of seeing how it feels ‘not to walk very well’ … until my knee cap can heal, get medical attention for it.
Can I walk both roads at the same time? I’m going to … I’m not giving up on what I made my mind up to do … I will lose this weight, and I will recover from the knee injury.
Like Rhonda Rousey … I’m going into the ring … and kick some ass! I want to be alright once again. Oh by the way … I love Rhonda Rousey, and admire her. She came a long ways in her life. I don’t fight physically like she does … but, mentally and emotionally … I’m one Hell of a fighter … just like her.
I was thinking to tell you all … just be careful where you step. You never know what will slip you up in life, derail you from the road you are traveling on …. put you on another road to go down. I never even saw this coming.
Note by this Author:
I’m not feeling self-pity … all I’ve written is true. I have shared this experience … and I know there must be other people who have, or are experiencing such as I am. I have heard of being turned down by doctors …
As of today … I have been turned down in this one year by doctors because of money I didn’t have … so, ‘now’ … I know it is true. It’s sad.
I’m going to be alright … one way or other. I will be glad when the day comes … I can look back on this. I will be glad when everything is okay once again.
Photo/true story owned, written by me … Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/ #@GeeGranny