Is That Any of my Business?





Is That Any of my Business?

By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee/@GeeGranny on Twitter



Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee


I have been thinking about something I read on Facebook a couple days ago.  One of my FB friends shared it.  It was very thought-provoking.


It had something to do with someone seeing a person who was dressed nice … using a card for food stamps.  It disturbed the person seeing that this person was dressed in clean … nice, neat clothes … while using the food stamp card.


Now, I’ve been thinking about this since I read it.  I was thinking … ‘suppose that person had been used to doing well … working, paying their bills, payments … then, lost their job and had to get public assistance‘?


‘Suppose the clothes they were wearing were all they had … and they happened to look … nice’?


‘Suppose … that they had pride and was trying to feel the best they could by dressing in their nicest clothes, jewelry to keep from being so embarrassed’?


‘Suppose … they went to the store to pick up groceries for their disabled loved on’?


I think my questions here, are:


Should one dress poorly if they have fallen on bad luck?


Should one go to a thrift store, buy clothes to look the part, and … dress ‘down’?


Should one put their nice clothes, jewelry up … until times are better … so, no one will think they don’t deserve to use a food stamp card … or get assistance?


When times are rough … does anyone have the right to look their best instead of ‘their worse’ … to show, satisfy others that their appearance ‘tells the story’?  What does one do?


I see people who use food stamp cards … have on nice clothes, talk on a cellphone, drive a nice car … live in a pretty decent home.  I was wondering … because they are ‘down and out for a time’ … do they need to go find a ‘slum-house’ to live in … not drive their nice car they tried to work hard to keep, but ‘fell on hard times‘?


Should they give up anything that could possibly attract yours, my attention to let us know that times didn’t use to be so hard for them?  Should they dress to satisfy us that they deserve any assistance they get?  Is it any of yours, my business?


I learned long ago when I worked with the public … that not everyone is well off because they dress nice, wear nice jewelry.  I also, learned that people have lots of pride … it’s embarassing to ask for help.  It’s embarrassing to be seen using that assistance.  They probably wear the very best of what they have to help boost their courage to go get what they need.


I have been thinking hard on this … in my mind I have placed it on the ‘revolving table’ where it can go ’round and ’round.  I have been looking at it from many angles.


I could keep on and on …. on this subject.  My Gloria Opinion is that we don’t know what others are going through … everyone’s situation is unique.  Who am I to judge?  Who are you to judge?


We have been through our own tough times, live on a very tight budget … it still doesn’t stop me from trying to feel good about myself.  Any chance I get … I will buy a blouse and try to get the prettiest for as less as I can.  I don’t use food stamps, get public assistance … but, it doesn’t mean I won’t one day.


I just know I’ve experienced enough in all my years by going through hard times … watching people suffer … that we never know what we are going to be faced with.  I know people who have always had the best … no longer can afford the best anymore.  We used to have the best … we can’t afford the best anymore.  But … we do the best … with what we have.


It’s easy to give others the impression of being well-off … outer appearances don’t necessarily reflect how ‘bad’ things are.  Pride … trying to be all right … not wanting others to know … not wanting to ask for anything.  Wanting to be independent without being a weight on anyone else.  These are good qualities in a person … though sad … because it isn’t easy for them to ask for help.


These people go without … until desperation pushes them to go seeking help.  Then … others condemn them for not looking ‘poor’, or driving the vehicles they always had … and such things like maybe they have a nice home they are trying their best to hang onto.


This is me trying to bring up something to think about … something to help when judging others without knowing.  Yes, I know there are people who abuse the system … but, people are like that in all walks of life.


I mean … look at people in good positions … embezzling money for years while all their co-workers look up to them with high regard … just knowing they’d never do any wrong.  I’ve known several people who have worked at jobs … dressing better than anyone else, eating better than anyone … looking down their noses at the very ones … they have been robbing for years.


Lots of people steal at their jobs … ‘good’ people who are well respected, god-fearing ‘folks’.  People turn their heads to keep from getting involved.  They talk about amongst themselves … I’ve listened.  I’ve watched people like that … treat others badly … yet they’re most thieving people in the world.


We’ve had a lot of them through the years where I’ve lived.  It’s always a shock to everyone … not to me, everytime.  I’m always sensing people … I’m not saying all ‘good’ people are bad … lots of good people can do ‘bad’.


Many get away with it … they go on to live wonderful lives, travel, raise families … and look down their noses at others … all the while they have lived, supported their families on the backs of others.  You know I’m right … a good chance is that you could be one who does this.


Open your eyes at these people who are so angry, hateful … you can’t be nice to them …. something is making them that way.  I’m not saying that it’s being dishonest all the time … people have personal problems.


I’ve been thinking these thoughts for the past two days.  Just thought I’d share them.  I won’t argue any of them with anyone.  You have your right to your opinion … just as I do … mine.


This is a subject we could go on and on about.  It’s a never-ending subject … so many situations.  I guess what I’m trying to say is … it’s too easy to think the worst of someone … hard to think the best when our eyes are seeing something that conflicts with what we believe to be a certain way.


I just had a flash-back to twenty some years ago.  I was in a supermarket, saw an older woman with lots of pretty jewelry on her wrinkled hands … her clothes were expensive.  She paid for her groceries with food stamps.  I saw her hands shaking and I felt she was very embarrassed.  When I got outside I looked to see if she was in the parking lot.  She was … putting her groceries in a very nice car.


Did I think the worst of her?  At first, I honestly did … until it came to my mind that the lady wasn’t always in a position she used food stamps.  Then … I thought … is that any of my business?




Note by this Author:


True thoughts/photos owned, written by Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee.


Have you ever tried to think about such things … try to see how things could be … besides just … bad?  How about when it comes to judging others … seeing the best, instead of the worse?  Cared, even if that person never knew it … say a simple prayer that everything will be all right for them?


Haven’t you ever been ashamed to misjudge someone?  I have … it’s the truth.  I have … and I felt very little.


These are just thoughts that have been been going around in my head.  I’m just sharing them.  I’m not an expert at anything … but, I do … think a lot … about everything.


6 thoughts on “Is That Any of my Business?

  1. Good blog Gloria! 🙂

    I NEVER judge by appearances and give everyone one shot.

    I sometimes get ripped off, like my female neighbour did to me, but I know better now and she’ll not get a second chance! 😦

    My neighbour Joanne drives as 4×4 and has a nice home and children, has worked hard in the past, but she’s now a young widow and struggling to make ends meet.

    I can’t help her, but I know what she’s going through and the day the 4×4 disappears will be the day I know she’s getting desperate. 😦

    My female neighbour just knocked on.

    Apparently her benefits didn’t go through on Monday, but she says she’ll have money on the 5th of January.

    Given what the social services are like for stopping benefits at the drop of a hat I can understand! 😦

    Oh well: We’ll see… 🙂

    Love and hugs!


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