You Had Better Act Like Somebody…


You Had Better Act Like Somebody…

By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee

Going out into the world daily, I see some of the nicest people in the world.  I know there’s not a mean bone in their body.  I see such warm smiles, kind words… actions even nicer than their smiles, words.  They‘d never hurt a ‘flea’.  Everyone ‘acts so nice’!

There’s no way possible… they are ever mean, ugly… real.  They are like that… all the time.  Those good, sweet, kind, perfect… wonderful people.  I wish I could be … like that.  I am just… me.  I can be so nice… sometimes, I’m not feeling like being nice.  Darn it… it’s hard to be something… I’m not.

That’s ‘why’ I’m the first person to tell you … I’m not perfect… I’m just not perfect at all.  The only thing I have going for me is… I really try to be a good person… the best person I can possibly be… all the while making mistakes, learning to the day that I … die.

Doors are opened for others… ‘let me get that for you’.  Why just yesterday… Skip ran into a situation that… wasn’t acting.  The man was … really ‘himself’… without a mask.

Skip was at a store, getting ready to walk outside.  A guy in front of him walked out the door, as Skip began through the door… the door slammed on him, knocking his drink out of his hand.

The man in front of him …never bothered to hold the door out of courtesy… for just a second until… Skip could also, make his exit.  Skip made a sound… the man turned around, told Skip he was in a hurry, went on about his life.

The man never acted like he was a nice guy… he was really what he was… he didn’t pretend.  He didn’t care if anyone saw him for the real person he was.  He was a … turd.  Yes, he was a… turd.  Shame on him.

Most people are like this… but, in public we try to hide it… we try to project ourselves as the ‘nicest person in the world’.  That man must have given up … pretending.  Even if we don’t feel nice… we should pretend we are.  I’m not saying to the extent… someone would take advantage of us.

I’m glad I wasn’t there… I would have smiled at him, softly told him what he was.  I would have been nice about it.  Guess what?  I would have my ‘sweet, nice mask’ on.  I would be acting… nice, when in fact… I would be just before being… ugly.

I can say this too, in all honesty.  That man didn’t know he could have gotten his ass kicked… all he saw was an older man coming behind him.  He probably intended for that door to hit Skip.  Skip could have reminded him of something he didn’t like in his own life.  Maybe his ‘old daddy’… or old grandfather he hated.  Maybe …he hated his ‘old ass’ …self.

I think people make a mistake when they ‘see older people, assume they are ‘weak’.  I think they make a mistake… when they make this mistake.  Knowledge, experience ‘got that older person this far’……

Haven’t you heard on the news how criminals sometimes, meet more than their match when they rob ‘an old grandma’… go to beat up ‘an old man’.  They get their ass kicked… and some more.  I love it.

My advice is… you never know what you’re going up against… someone might be ‘old’… but, it’s knowledge, experience that counts.  You might get more than you bargain for.

Some ‘old’ people know how to fight back… you don’t know what you’re messing with.  Some of these ‘old codgers’ might know martial arts; they might be veterans… who fought for your ‘little boy or little girl ass’ when you were a child … for your freedom.

Then… some of you grew up to ‘rob them, murder them’… after they fought for the world you live in.  Yeah… they fought for ‘your freedom’… just so you could murder, rob, or humiliate ‘them’ one day when they are ‘old’.  Shameful…  You ‘act like’ you care, love, respect them… all the while… waiting for them to become weak.

Sometimes, it gets into some younger people’s minds… ‘older people don’t need what they have anymore… they are old; they could die any day’.  I need it… I can do a lot with their things to make my life better.

They begin to plot, to plan, to slowly ‘take’… by ‘acting’ like they’re somebody.  It could be a lover, girlfriend, boyfriend, best friend, daughter, son, grandchild… a ‘loving one’.  It’s easier to take what you want… if you …act like somebody.

Strange enough… others can ‘see’ it.  The person who is ‘old’ doesn’t see it… they just want to be loved, cared about.  They want to believe in someone who is ‘acting like somebody’ they know… loves them.

I think you, like me… love it when an ‘old’ person gives somebody ‘bad’… what for.  I love it when an ‘old’ person’s eyes ‘open’… and they begin to see through others… see that the people who ‘acted like they loved them’… are deceitful, dishonest.

Especially when in life they… ‘use their position in life’… to deceive to take from an older person.  This could be a pastor, a fireman, cop, christian… whoever.  I love it… when ‘their acting’ can be … seen through; they are no longer trusted; no longer ‘well-thought’ of.

I love it when an old person kicks somebody’s ass… when they come up to physically assault, rob, murder them.  I love it when I see evidence of ‘their ass getting kicked’.  I love it when ‘they get it good’…

Acting… it seems that ‘acting’ is what makes the world go ’round.  If we act like somebody… we gain in life.  Just depends on what, who you act like to gain trust, material things.  We’ve all been guilty in one way or other.

We’ve all acted to be ‘somebody, something in this life in order to be accepted’… pretending the whole way.  That’s ‘how doors are opened’ to us.  How many ‘real people’ do you …know?  Sometimes… we hate the people ‘who know us as we really are’………..

So, think about what I wrote above… acting to deceive a person into thinking someone loves them… when there’s no love there… only …greed.  I know a lot of people like this… I recognize them if I don’t know them.  Don’t you?  I know you do.

I think this is one of the most awful things we can do… unless the one who ‘acts’… acts it all out in a ‘good’ way, never hurting, harming another.  How many times does that happen?

How many times a day do you smile, be so honey-sweet to people when you would like to tell them what you really think?  You have to if you are going to be out in the world… you are… going to have to act.  You are going to … have to pretend you are something… you really aren’t.  Do you know why?

Because, you’ll be shunned… people will go in an opposite direction when they see you coming… if you don’t ‘act right’.  Watch people’s expressions when they ‘see you’… if you sense they’re thinking ‘oh no! it’s you… again’!  You are probably sensing …right.

Even I have sensed that through time.  I don’t think there’s a person who hasn’t sensed that.  No one likes ‘you’… all the time… no matter how pretty, sweet, ‘good’… you are.  Sometimes, I like ‘mean’ people… sometimes, I like ‘ugly’ people.  Sometimes, I hate ‘everyone’… no matter ‘how they act’.  We all are like that.

I smile inside because when I see people I know… out in the world ‘acting’.  Why?  Because, you hear people say, ‘isn’t that the nicest person’?  I’m knowing probably that’s the ‘meanest man, woman that ever walked in two shoes’.

What’s funnier… really isn’t fun-ny… is when people say that about people we all hold in high esteem… and ‘we know better’.

I can look back through time… and remember ‘people who were the best christians, and even a pastor’… who chased a little girl I know personally… to do things… ‘ungodly’.

I am sure all of you can look back, remember such things in your own life.  Just because you say ‘someone is a cop, pastor, doctor, lawyer, fireman… so on, so on’… doesn’t mean they are all ‘good’.  We all have to ‘act a part’ when we go out into the world.  If not… you’ll be shunned.

There’s always a ‘bad apple’ in … everything.  Always remember that… open your eyes… and you’ll spot it no matter how ‘pretty, shiny, spotless’ it is. The better it looks… the better it hides to deceive others.  Think about a serial killer… that’s how they do to get their victims… they appear ‘perfect’ to everyone.

Nothing is perfect… I know… at one time in my life… I really tried to be; I couldn’t.  Keep an eye out for bad apples… they’re rotten to the core… don’t believe me?  Just bite into it…..

So, if you get up feeling bad, feeling as if you ‘hate the world’… you had better think twice.  In our world … you’d better ‘act like somebody’… whether you like it … or not.  Act ‘like somebody… even if … you aren’t’.

I suggest acting like a good person… even if you aren’t.  You might fool yourself into believing you’re a good person… before you know it… you might be one.  Acting, believing is how we develop habits… now, all I got to do is to ‘act thin’… that’s the habit I have forgotten.  :)))

I’m going to try my best to act like somebody… myself.  Hopefully, I can … act in a good way, be real.  I don’t like to fool people.  So, I’m going to act like somebody… Gloria.

Do You See How Life Can Sneak Up On You?


Do You See How Life Can Sneak Up On You?

By Gloria Faye Brown Bates/aka Granny Gee

 

 

I’ve been thinking about ‘when’ one ages.  I know that life takes its toll on each of us in different ways.  In different ways… just as how the waves erode the sands through time, taking the shore away a little at a time; how the wind blows sand, dust in the desert to shape, mold all in its path, smoothing, wearing down.  Just as life comes at us, shaping… molding us through time… until we become… old, sometimes… not so smooth.

 

I have been studying my photos, and I ‘see something that could have happened if I hadn’t recognized it’.  In fact, it had begun to happen again… because life had caught me off guard with the death of my son.

 

Not only the death of my son… several times through time, I was caught off guard by the events that happened… time passed before I was ‘aware of myself’ again.  I became lost each time, several years passing ‘before’ I became aware of all around me once again.  Each time, I had to ‘begin all over again’…..

 

In my life, I had several years of suffering from a major illness that would have made some people bedridden ‘the rest of their life’… becoming lost in time.  I ‘see’ how people can be beaten by life’s experiences until they are too weary to get back up again.  There might come a time, when one can see that ‘it’s either now… or never’… that if, they are going to ‘get back up to live’… they’d better do it… now.  If one misses that opportunity……

 

Their bodies, minds weakened… some just stay where they are, where it’s safe… they become bedridden.  They no longer have to fight… God, how good that feels.  You really don’t even have to … think.  Just exist, just ‘be’.

 

Loved ones can protect, care for one.  They can think for them.  All you have to do is to… ‘be’.  Everyone knows you are …too sick, to help yourself.  It’s alright to be bedridden… God knows your body has come through something… you have a legitimate reason to ‘lay there’…

 

That’s not to say that happens to everyone… because I know people become bedridden, there’s no chance for them to ‘come back to themselves’… yet… look at the fighting spirit so many have.  I admire them… they don’t give up… they might seem to… but, they ‘get back up’.

 

How do I know?  I ‘recognized’ the point it could have happened to me… but, no matter the family I come from, I have something they all have, had.

 

A ‘fighting spirit’… one hell of a fighting spirit that I’m thankful to have had passed onto me.  ‘Now’… I’m thankful for the harsh lessons they taught me as a little girl… to survive.  To be a fighter… I’ll fight to the end!

 

I look back in time, see where I could have stayed there… stayed where life was safer, someone could care for me like a baby, protect me.  When I became aware … I began to fight.

 

I ‘meant to come back’, I wanted to live life no matter …if it hurt me again, and again, and … again.  It did hurt me again… and again… again.  I have had to start over… so many times.  Why I didn’t give up… I can‘t say… I can just say my fighting spirit pushed me ‘up’.

 

So many times, with pain ripping through my body, tears falling from my eyes, flowing down onto my face, cries and moans coming from my lips… I have made me get stronger.  Not only that… Skip was always there, saying things that would ‘push me back to being ‘me’… again’.  He wouldn’t let me give up… Skip is my hero.

 

I look at my photos that go back in time… I can ‘see’ the points in time, I could have let myself ‘become old, and gray’.  I can see ‘where I caught myself just in the nick of time’… I thank God.

 

I’ve missed out on years of my life… didn’t know I was in the living world, didn’t care.  Thank God, somehow I have made it back ‘just in the nick of time’… I ‘would have disappeared without knowing it, I would have went on to being a person I wouldn’t recognize in my mirror’…

 

That’s ‘why I look for myself’ constantly… why, I try to find ‘me’, get ‘me back’.  You, who are younger and are reading this, I promise you… my words will forever stay in your minds.  You will come to points in your life as you become older… you are going to say to yourself.. ‘oh my, I ‘see’ what Gloria/Granny Gee meant.

 

Life will take its toll on you at one time or other… it’s going to happen.  If you are aware of what to expect… then, that old saying comes in:  ‘being forewarned is to be … forearmed’.

 

I’ve never read in words how it feels to become older, or anything like I’ve written here.  I’ve always had to learn the hard way about life… looking for what I could learn from all life has ‘thrown at me’.  I’ve studied myself, watched, listened, trying to learn from all around me, from others.

 

I try to ‘stay forewarned/forearmed’… :)))  If I am aware of things… then, I can be prepared.  Sadly… one can’t be always… prepared for what comes in life, so unexpectedly.

 

Saying that is so easy…  life hasn’t been that way at all.  I haven’t been prepared for major illnesses, or the death of my only child, or some of the other things in my life.  Tommy died May 29, 2010.

 

I had to learn on my own ‘how’ to come out of these battles I fought, struggled to get through.  I’ll say it again, Skip is my hero… he has been the light/beacon… always shining ‘out there’ for me to keep going toward… it took so long, but, each time I’ve made it.  If he hadn’t been there… well, I might not be here… no one else was there for me.

 

Getting back to the photos of me through time… I’ve shared some of them with you recently.  They depict through time how life has taken its toll on my face.

 

Can’t you see now, that you’ve seen these photos… how there were ‘those times’ that if not recognized in time… I would have went on to ‘age until old’?  No one would have known me anymore.  How ‘white’ I was becoming through time.  Now… I have ‘some color about myself’, once again!  :)))

 

Can you see how I’ve tried to ‘catch myself’ and not let it happen until I can’t prevent it?  I fight to ‘hold onto me’…. I want those years of my youth that I have lost to life’s circumstances.  I want to see me in my mirror, at least enough… to know it’s not someone else peeping out of my mirror at me!

 

My body might hold such pain every day of my life… that’s okay, I’m living… that was the ‘trade-off I made’ to get to live.  I’ve learned to live with such pain, I’m proud to say I don’t take drugs to manage it… though, there are times I am almost tempted.  I can’t bear any ‘extra pain’… though, at times… it happens.

 

I may take medicine when a doctor prescribes it… most of the time, I don’t.  I have a fear of becoming addicted to drugs… even if I never have.  That fear has been in me since being very young… watching what drugs did to my loved ones… what alcohol did.  I always want my mind to be clear… I want to know what is going on… at all times, even if it hurts.

 

Truthfully, the one time I didn’t care was when my child died… for a time, without realizing it any longer… I did take medicine that I don’t even remember the name of.  It was so powerful… I barely remember the doctor who prescribed it to me.  No, I just thought about it, I can’t remember the doctor who prescribed it to me… there’s no face in my mind.

 

I only knew that Tommy had… died.  Every minute, I ‘knew Tommy had just died’… the medicine protected my mind, put me in darknesss so, I wouldn’t have to see, so… I wouldn’t have to feel.

 

I could even smile when I took that medicine… and my son had just died.  How potent is that?  I couldn’t have lived if… I hadn’t had something so powerful to numb me, keep me in the darkness that I… so, wanted to stay in.

 

For now… I’m aware of myself again… I will fight to stay younger… for a little longer.  Hopefully, it will be ‘forever’ before something else happens to make me ‘lose myself’ once again.  Just look at me, and you’ll see an example, know from my words how life can be.

 

Do you see… how life sneaks up on one?  How it can take your youth, your years of your life… away?  If you don’t believe me… look at my photos below:   Do you see how life sneaks up on you?

 

   Year 2010…

  Year 2011

 

Photo above left… Year 2012                    Photo above right… Year 2013  ‘now’…

Year 2013… ‘now’…

 

Year 2013… ‘now’…